


One for the Money, Two for the Show

by Cabach



Series: A Gentleman and a Flirt [1]
Category: Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Bad Flirting, Charisma 10, I wrote this in 2 hours, Intelligence 10, Luck 1, M/M, Warden is just a flirt who like to cause chaos, Warden is just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:14:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26187034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cabach/pseuds/Cabach
Summary: Nature outweighing Art begets roughness.Art outweighing Nature begets pedantry.Art and Nature well blended makes a gentleman.Mordecai Warden was many things, but a gentleman was not among them.
Relationships: Male Courier/Arcade Gannon, Male Courier/Pacer (alluded to), Male Courier/The King (alluded to), The King/Pacer
Series: A Gentleman and a Flirt [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2018852
Kudos: 11





	One for the Money, Two for the Show

**Author's Note:**

> (I wrote this in like 2 hours, haven't edited it, and haven't had it beta'd. I finished this quest with my chaotic flirt of a son and my mind wouldn't let me rest till I finished this dumpster fire. Also, Warden is 100% proof that you can be smart but still be dumb as balls)
> 
> There might be more to come but idk

“What’s my silence worth to ya?” Warden asked him pointedly, a reversed parallel to their first meeting.

Pacer’s lip actually twitched upward at that, the closest Warden had ever seen him to an actual smile. “You're a bastard after my own heart. Here, this should be enough to buy it.”

He passed Warden a sack of caps. By the feel of it, Warden guessed it was around 200. A small fortune to anyone else in the Mojave but pittance to him.

“That’s _it_?” Warden asked, acting askance. At Pacer’s hard look, he gave a dramatic sigh, putting the sack in his pocket. “That’ll be enough to keep me warm when I tell the King about the peace offering.”

Pacer’s anger was immediate. “Why you lit—You’re just lucky I got something important to take care of. We’ll settle this later,” he said, his voice promising later danger as he stormed off.

Warden grinned jauntily at him, pushing past into the theatre with his hands in his pockets. He winked at him as he passed, making Pacer’s face grow redder.

“Hey, _Kiiiiing_!” Warden called, sing-song, as he approached the head table. “Ya’ll never guess what I just found out…”

\---------------------

Warden was disappointed.

Pacer was nowhere to be seen, which meant that his plan of “pretending to tell the King about the envoy that Pacer beat up to screw over the NCR” failed. He didn’t actually spill Pacer’s secret, but pretending to wasn’t much fun without him there to kick him under the table or glare at him.

Warden sighed in discontent, putting his chin in one hand as he braced his elbow on the table. He was not sulking, but in his not-sulking, he didn’t even notice the commotion behind him until one of the newer Kings, who had just burst into the theatre, was right in front of the table he and the King were sharing.

“King, we got a problem!” one of the newer Kings exclaimed. He was out of breath, like he had run a great distance at top speed. He probably did.

“There’s a shootout goin’ down by the train station! It’s Pacer and some strangers, might be NCR.”

“Holy shit,” Warden breathed, surprised that Pacer would be so bold. Was that his “something important” that he had mentioned earlier.

“What is that fool doing?” The King sounded angry. But more than that, he sounded worried. The King turned in his chair to face Warden. “I need you to get down there and try to defuse the situation. Anything. I’m willing to cooperate.”

“Already on it, King.” Warden stood and dashed out of the School of Impersonation, the Kings clearing the way before him. He ran through Freeside and past the Wrangler and Silver Rush, through the little door in the ruined building at the northeast end of the alley.

He could hear gunfire to his left and scrambled through the concrete ruins of the fallen freeway. Pacer was just ahead, taking cover in an old bus stop.

“Pacer, what in the hell are ya doing?” Warden hollered over from the crumbling concrete he was taking cover behind. Pacer’s head whipped up from where he was also taking cover (cowering, _he_ was cowering) from the NCR in the tower.

Even from the distance, Mordecai could see the Kings’ sneer. “Figured I better do something to get back in the King’s good graces after you ratted me out.”

“I was _joking around_ , you dumb fuck!” he shouted, taking his chances and dashing to the bus stop where Pacer was. “I just wanted to make you squirm in your seat a bit! Thought you were going to stick around for a bit so I could poke fun at you a bit in front of the King.”

Pacer actually looked a bit chagrined, a faint blush rising on his cheeks. “Oh.”

“’Oh’? _‘OH?’_ Is that all you have to say. Goddammit, man, for a jet junkie you sure are paranoid. And _jumpy_.”

He opened his mouth angrily, but then he ducked as another hail of bullets hit their cover. “ _How’d you find out about that_?” he whispered heatedly.

“Is this really the time to ask those kinda questions?” Warden hissed back. “Shut up. Ya got us both in this damn pickle. D’ya have anythin’ to show for it, at least?”

At Pacer’s confused silence, Warden rolled his eyes and explained exasperatedly, “ _Are ya hurt_ , ya idiot?”

The gangster gestured down to his leg. A cursory look revealed he had been shot below the knee, just a graze, but he wouldn’t be able to run in that state.

Warden checked his Pip-boy for the time and ran a hand down his face wearily. He had promised Julie he’d drop off some more supplies before he left Freeside again and he was already going to be late, and not even fashionably this time. “Ya couldn’t’ve picked a better time to do this? I’m _busy._ ”

He poked his head out to do some quick recon, pulling it back into safety as they immediately started firing at him.

“Fuckin NCR, always gettin’ butthurt at the tiniest insults. Swear to God, Imma kick ‘em outta the Mojave altogether if they shoot at me One More Time.”

A stray bullet pinged against their shelter and Warden’s lips narrowed.

“The things I do for cute butts and slicked-back hair,” he said with a burdensome sigh.

“What?!”

“Just sit tight here,” Warden continued, as if he hadn’t heard Pacer’s outburst. He pulled out his bat and bowie knife, and held them in one hand as he stuck himself with half a syringe of med-x. “I’ll be right back. You’re gonna get my medical bill, call it fair for saving ya life.”

Pacer began spluttering, but Warden ignored him in favor of rushing the NCR soldiers.

\---------------------

The fight was over faster than he expected (and maybe faster than he’d hoped), and Warden managed to sustain only a few nicks and scrapes (bullet wounds). They didn’t feel too bad, but Warden was smart enough to know that that was because of the med-x in his system

“Fucker,” he said without any real venom, kicking one of the soldiers on the ground. He groaned, so at least he wasn’t dead. Probably have a nasty concussion once he woke up proper.

Warden limped back to the bus stop, where Pacer was still cowering.

He knocked his bat against the metal of the bus stop, startling Pacer. “Hey.”

“Are you finished, then?”

“Yep,” he said, putting a hand on the frame to steady himself. “C’mon, I’ll help _ya_ over to the Followers if ya help _me_. Whadyya say?”

“Fuck you,” Pacer said, though he stood to lean against Warden.

“Yeah aiight, okay. If ya ask nicely,” Warden hummed, putting the arm not holding his bat around Pacer. He smelled like smoke.

Leaning against each other, they started their slow journey to the Old Mormon Fort, Warden able to keep up a lighthearted banter because of the med-x cloud.

“Is it smart for you to smoke with your… condition?”

“I don’t smoke.”

“But the King does though. Ya two been getting’ awful close haven’t ya?” Warden teased.

Pacer was silent, resolutely staring ahead of them.

Warden barked a laugh. “Wait, ya actually are together?! Hell, I would’ve admired your rear less if I’d’ve known. And his.”

“You’ve been ogling _the King_?”

Another laugh. “Can ya blame me?”

“… no.”

\---------------------

Warden laughed all the way to the Fort, where even Julie’s less than gentle bedside manner and Arcade’s lingering touches couldn’t put a damper on his mood.

“You’ll be singing a different tune when that med-x wears off,” Julie warned him. Then to Pacer, “Make sure he doesn’t take any more for the next week.”

“Do I look like a babysitter to you?” he exclaimed, offended. She leveled him with a glare that made him lower his gaze.

“Um, yes, ma’am,” he corrected weakly.

“Then you're free to go.”

“Arcade could walk us back to the King’s,” Warden offered with a knowing grin. “Male sure we don’t get lost.”

Arcade’s entire face, ears and neck included, turned an impressive shade of pink.

“I think you can find your own way sure enough,” he said, all but fleeing from the tent.

Julie shook her head knowingly, giving Warden another sharp glare that was tinged with both fondness and exasperation. In his current state, it wasn’t as potent as it normally was, and he grinned at her.

“Can we leave now, Jul?”

She pursed her lips at the nickname, then nodded. “Try not to overwhelm anymore of my doctors on the way out.”

“No promises,” he promised, with another wink.

\---------------------

“That Followers doctor is carrying a torch for you for sure,” Pacer said, once they were in Freeside proper. They were still leaning on each other, both limping a little. They could probably walk on their own, but it was safer not to test it. That was the only reason Warden stayed where he was. Yep. Only reason.

“Mhm.”

“You gonna hit that?”

“Oh for sure! After I tease him a few more times, you’ve seen how red his face gets.”

They laughed together a few moments.

“Say, are we friends now, Pace?”

“Don’t call me that, and no.”

“Suit yaself, Pace.”

“I hate you.”

“Sure, sure, and I could still tell the King _all_ about how ya were holdin’ out on ‘im.”

“But you won’t.”

“That’s awfully bold of ya to assume.”

(Pacer was right though.)

\---------------------

“I’ve already heard all about what happened, and all I can say is that I, and all of Freeside, thank you. Thank you very much,” the King said as they entered the theatre again, a little worse for wear.

Warden allowed Pacer to ease him into his chair (it was more like “dropped” rather than “eased” but Warden was still in a good mood and decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.)

“You’re welcome, King. Couldn’t’ve done it without good ol’ Pace here.”

Someone kicked him under the table. Warden grinned. Pacer.

“You’ve helped us plenty, Warden, so I’ll tell you what. Just this once, name whatever you want, and if I can make it happen, it’s done.”

Warden perked up at the King’s words. The King was a genuine man, more genuine than most Warden had come across, and he liked The King because of it. Even then, now that he knew he and Pacer were a thing, he _had_ to tease his partner somehow. So his gaze slid to Pacer and he grinned once they made eye contact, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Pacer’s face tightened, eyes narrowing pointedly.

“Thank ya very much, King,” Warden said, mimicking the King’s tone from earlier. He could see the King’s eyes light up as he realized Warden was picking up his accent. “But I’ll haveta take ya up on that offer later. I’m awful tired.”

“The School’s doors are always open for you,” the King said, his eyes gleaming. Warden held back a laugh as it was made clear to him that the knew exactly what he and Pacer were up to, and that he was _encouraging_ their rivalry. 

The King continued, “And there’s always a bed open upstairs if you need it.”

Warden again made eye contact with Pacer. “That sounds great. Help me up to bed, would ya, Pace!”

That earned him another not-so-subtle kick under the table.

**Author's Note:**

> Man, I miss Warden so much :,(  
> I'm going to school out of state and couldn't bring my console with me so he's gonna have to wait until break. Pour one out for my bisexual disaster homie Warden


End file.
